Tuesday, September 23, 2008

A Forum for Horses

So, I am thinking I shall keep up with this blog (indeed, that was my hope and intention) - I very much look forward to a forum happening though (hint hint - am I allowed to do that...?) - probably a powerful benefit I see is having some kind of section where questions are asked of me so I can clearly see what I have and have not answered.

I am afraid to think of the number of questions that have gone unanswered here at Monster Blog Tattoo because I lose track of them in all the comments. Sorry to anyone who feels a bit snubbed by such an oversight, please, if you dare, ask again.

In light of this contrition I shall now attempt to answer a question.

Dear portals was axing a quekstion... "So far all the Haacobin Empire's armies seem to all be made up of foot soldiers and suchlike. from what I know about history, cavalry always seems to be a great asset to any army, so why does the Empire have none.Sorry if they do have some, but with the definition for the Armies of the Empire, the Battle of the Gates, and the different city states in the Explicarium, nothing was mentioned about cavalry."

An excellent inquiry. If you look in the Explicarium of Book 1, under the entry for equiteer you shall find the very reason why cavalries are so little used. The long and the short of it is many monsters find our equine friends rather toothsome making the fielding of a substantial force of cavalry a sure way to attract a monster or three right into the fray of battle. That is why horses go out shabraqued and covered in nullodour but this makes a large force of them even more expensive and high maintenance. In Book 3 (ie, Factotum) I introduce the concept of cabaline lands - regions tamed (cicurated) for so long that they are considered generally safe for horses. If battles occur in such regions you could well expect to see a greater use of equiteers, indeed, perhaps this is why the lords of the H-c like stouching with each other in their boutique wars, a chance to crack out the cavalry and give it a good run.

Oh, and there was an excellent article/interview over at the Galaxy Express about steam-punk, where good ol' MBT gets a wee plug - nice to have a home, though I still don't think I'm strictly true steam-punk (due largely to the absence of steam in the H-c)... but now I am being picky.

And for those a French-speaking persuasion I was gratified to find not one but two positive reviews of the French edition of MBT, Terre de Monstres ("GROUND OF THE MONSTERS") - if my understanding of the tongue of France is correct, though in correction to the first review: En fait, l'auteur a dessiné les illustrations internes.

For breakfast I had honied flakey things, Irish Breakfast tea and a good pray.

I nearly forgot the most shattering news of all! Today I shaved off my beard! Dun dun dunnnnnn....


Slight said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
D.M. Cornish said...

That is rather mysterious...

MooseGuy said...

Mysterious indeed.

As monsters are occasionally 'tamed' for use in battle (right?), could they be possibly used as steeds of some description? Or at least to pull things around (like a chariot, siege engine, etc.).

Also, would I be correct in saying that when it comes to animals (excluding monsters and everymen) and plants, the H-C's wildlife is very similar to that here on Earth? Or are there some varieties of non-monstrous beasties you are yet to tell us about?

Zakk said...

You know, sometimes i get sick to death of breakfast stories. Maybe you should publish a memoir:
"Monsters, Weet-bix, Writing and everything in between" Perhaps the things in between would in clude this monster blog tattoo.

Eagerly awaiting MBT3,

Armoruedyoda said...

Yay!!! A forum! Exactly what I wanted! Though I also like the blog so your descision to keep that has made me happy.

Portals- This is urgent unendorse my brother NOW!!! and endorse the current delegate!

portals said...

Okay! That's it! Time to tell everyone the truth about armoruedyoda.
1. He has not read Lamplighter
2. He tells people that Foundling is bad and only comes onto this website to annoy me.
3. He pronounces Rosamund - Roozomoond
4. He actually tried to make his blog name Armoured Yoda, but spelt it badly.
5. He really doesn't care about whether or not there is a forum.
6. He hates Licurius

I have no intention of being mean, but please read lamplighter before you start posting comments. I said it before, there are so many spoilers here!
One more thing armoruedyoda -

Sorry about him.

In the battle of the Gates, the Turkmen army uses monsters called bolbogis (I Think) althought they are gudgeons.

Again, sorry about armoruedyoda, and, although he is my good friend, I just think that he should actually like MBT if he is going to use this site.

Femina said...

You could always link to the forum (if one starts) from here, and drop in every now and then to read the "questions for the author" section. :) I don't think a forum would be the death of this site, especially if people know that THIS is where you'll be posting.

Everything about that breakfast sounds good. But why the shave? The Spring air bring it on??

Jack Dixon Ryan said...


Could you really ride a monster?
I think that would be one of the stark raving mad ideas in the world. It would be cool... But I think it would label you a sedorner and get you to the gallows faster tan you could say "Come!"

A monster absolutely usually hates everymen. Most of those monstrous bogles, nickers, nadderers, ettins, urchins and Kraulshwimmen are terrible beasties.

I admit it- I am mostly an invidist. Towards most monsters.

Sam Hranac said...

DM says...
"I nearly forgot the most shattering news of all! Today I shaved off my beard! Dun dun dunnnnnn...."

So THAT was the sandpaper scraping sound I heard over in Seattle, WA USA.

Anonymous said...

This is a bit off-topic, but I was wonder what, if anything, happens if a leer catches a cold and still uses his sthenicon. And what would happen if a wit or a fulgar caught a cold? Would they just be miserable, or would their transplanted organs cause them trouble?

Heather Massey said...

Thank you very much for linking to my feature. I know a lot of readers eager to stretch their reading wings!

RottenPocket said...

Awwe Geez, my craziness must have rubbed off onto most of you people-Although I side with Carlita when they ask what happens if a Leer/Lagaard gets a cold :D

Uuhhh, Mooseguy I think monsters are of a higher level of intelligence than beasts of burden. The use of the word 'Tame' more likely refers to the fallback of Untermen in that area, leaving it a rather safe environment for horses and such to roam about freely.

There has been references of 'monsters' being the very embodiment of nature. The ability of speech in most shows learning, and I think Free will also, as there are both those who hate Everymen and those who are neutral and void them altogether ('cept for Eekers).

I also picked up on the way that the Herdebog Trought seemed to be trying to retrieve whatever the butchers had (probably another Unterman being sold for use by Swill), plus the supposed Sparrowling court, so they do have a societal structure (this in lamplighter, for those who's bell ain't ringin').

I guess people could use Gudgeons to battle, but they'd be more than likely to turn upon their makers (besides, it's not like they're preferred or approved Imperial foot soldiers now then are they?).

Just to annoy those who think I read into this way too much :D I think that the big brawny beasties that attack Everymen are either dumbly and defensive or are some kind of Untermen Freedom fighters, who get pissed at how arrogant and destructive Humans are. They are obviously the only ones heard or seen of, and used as an example, as they're the only monsters that ever come close to cities and people. Rumours exist of friendly beasts and of course any evidence of them actually existing is usually snuffed out by officials or whatever.

As to DM shaving off his beard, you are so going to regret it in a few days ><

D.M. Cornish said...

Ms Reinmuth, you are very close to the heart of things.

portals said...

EN Reinmuth
Sorry if i'm being picky, but it was actually the Turkmen army that used gudgeons at the Battle of the Gates.

Anonymous said...

Ooooh, I just love horses, sigh. Got one myself.

Anyway, just a thought. Perhaps that´s why Europe is using horses in the first book. To get the monsters to come for the horses and then.....
And of course the obvious fact that horses are suitable for a nobleman (or what you call it in english).

portals said...

Hi Mr. Cornish
I was wondering how monsters are classified in the H/C.
I remember reading that a monster is anything that is not a 'dumb animal', as said according to my source. I was just wondering why something like the Herdebog Trought is not considered a 'dumb animal' when a lion is. I am guessing a lion is not considered a monster in the H/C because at the Brisking Cat there is one on the sign, and I'm guessing the owner would not put a monster on the sign to their wayhouse.
Thanks for your time,

RottenPocket said...

Meh, I never said it was impossible. I think with some of the stuff that pours out of my mouth everyone should feel free to knock what I say head on. (It's constructive)

The :D faces are friendly faces. Don't take me too seriously.

Close to the heart as in I was right about the beard?

Thought you ought to know though, someone's been suggesting MBT for some kind of Children's Book week here in Brisbane. I've seen a poster of it somewhere. Wish I knew more about it.

Again on the note of what I say, should I just keep my mouth shut? I ask and discuss things matter-of-factly, but only because I'd like to know more.

Armoruedyoda said...

Number 5 on Portals list is a lie!!
Also I only tell people Foundling is bad infront of Portals to annoy him. When he is not around I tell people that Foundling is good. Also does it really matter that I dislike Licurius?

Anonymous said...

well long time no comment
i have been busy recently and have had no time to comment however i have been reading in the pole i beleave i would be most like little dog not shore why

Anonymous said...

^-giantfan- above comment

R Montallnutt said...

Mornin' fair folk,

Some random thoughts:
Terrors of the Forum - in a discussion about the H-c I would have thought flamers and stalkers and all other "E-bogles" would be a must to make up a suitably cross sectioned denizenry.

If you wear a toga to a forum - what on earth do you wear to a blog?

Monstrous society -could there be a monster city somewhere inhabited by monsters who live in fear of humans but generally ignore them (and hang any monsters that show affection for them)?

Cheers, beers and occasional jeers,


Jack Dixon Ryan said...

OK it's done.
For those who were interested in a forum there is now an unofficial, fan-powered forum so those who wish to have a forum can use it and DM can continue his wonderful blog and book series.

For those of you who are interested, the site is:

I encourage fans who wanted and would use a forum to test it out and send feedback because honestly, I have no clue on the computer or internet.

Keep writing, DM!!!!

RottenPocket said...

Dangit, I'd already started designing a template for a Fan Forum-Though it seems pointless as it is hard to find a forum Host that allows you to fully customise the template like Blogspot does...

I think it is safe to say that I am a Fan. A big one. No news of the Numps FanPic I'd been told would happen, though I want to ask if I could invent illustrations of what may be in the Ex Monsteria. I'm asking because I'm not quite sure If you plan on publishing an Official tome yourself just as the Arthur Spiderwick Chronicles have done, and I think it'd be fun to do at least a few pages myself.

Anonymous said...

One truly sees then just how...self-assured one would be to travel with eight horses, through ditchland at night, even if all the passengers are pugnators. Not that it was a preference but...

Mr. Cornish.
If sedornition earns one the noose, what other criminal codes and forms of punishment exist in the Empire? Have there been any notorious thieves or brigand kings? What is the normal form of law enforcement? Has anyone had facial a crourpunxis, which, in the form of a monster face, is tattooed around the wearer's face in some grotesque parody? How about fulgar with several blue spoors on the cheeks like tears?

E. N. Reinmuth.
I sometimes spew nonsense of the highest order myself. Above is a prime example of such jejune babblings. Feel free to wrap my knuckles if I get out of hand. Okay?

I know you aren't Jewish, I merely wanted to test out my Biblical Hebrew a bit. Unfortunately I don't have the proper font to write it in and I'm not sure the transliteration is accurate.

Femina said...

For those of you who are interested, the site is:

That link isn't working. Is it just me?

RottenPocket said...

... I think we just got a Spam Comment :O

Ben Bryddia-
Maybe our Minds are too big for our Mouths, or fingers in this case, with writing and such.

I tried. It failed. You're not the only one.

DM Cornish-
Forgot to ask, is it possible to have a preview of an Explicarium entry? :D
Preferably one concerning Rossamunderlings :D

Jack Dixon Ryan said...


The link is actually


yukO is a genealogy site.

Try the link and i think it will hopefully work.

portals said...

Ben Bryddia
Well good hebrew. I also like Hebrew, and the Jewish singing is awesome.
Everyone- please ignore armoruedyoda

Anonymous said...

I don't know about anyone else, but I think there should be a place to ask questions, probably to Mr. Cornish, that would be somewhere on this blog preferably. I see a lot of questions, but only a few are actually followed up on so maybe a Q&A section would help with that problem.