Hello hello, I hope you have all been well over the last week, and I hope you enjoy this next instalment.
Economous
musgrove
© D.M.Cornish
PLEASE DO NOT PUBLISH OR REPRODUCE WITHOUT MY PERMISSION
Chapter 2
A thing that ought not be
part 2
Asthetica’s
arrival provoked her mother, Madamine Grouse, to emerge from the ground floor door
of her private sanctums. Tall and still slender despite three children and being
well on the reverse slope of her prime, she bustled out with a hiss and rush of
many silken skirts like a sea-born gale to throw her arms about her daughter.
“Oh oh, my wenigblüte!” she cried, her accent thick
with the Gottish roll despite many years away from her homeland far across the
Pontus Canis to the south-east. “My little blossom! Home to me once more. How I dread
that someday it will be a skopp-boy instead to tell me that you are ground to
powder under the wheels of those awful flecheschatchel
and be returned to me as nothing more zan a sack of powder.”
“Mama…”
Asthetica glanced the merest long-suffering glance to Economous. “You know full
well I do not work with the gastrine mills, mama,” she continued her role in
the game. “The worst I might suffer is to be smothered under a great pile of
paper.”
These two
played much the same game every time he was there to witness he beloved’s
workday homecoming.
“Oh, how can
you say such horrors to your dearest old ma-ma!” Madamine Grouse demanded with
a pitch close to a wail. “You know how I fret myself to frays over you with untermensch – monsters – loose on every
turn and circuit…”
At this a tall
man entered the vestibule and graced the entire scene with a broad, knowing
smile but saving his longest most oily looks for Asthetica herself. Though only
a few years ahead of Econmous in age, the fellow was entire vaults filled with
coin ahead in quality of dress.
It was Monsiere
the Lord Sprandis Fold, Reive of Lot-in-the-Hole.
So far below
the man in station that a mere word from him could have them wisked off to the
Duke’s Bench, Binbrindle and Economous immediately bowed – just as they ought –
offering a duet of “M’lord” as they did.
The Reive
scarcely apprehended them, releasing them from their obeisance with a flick of
his velvet-gloved hand.
Glossy was the only word Economous could
think to describe the man as he straightened: glossy brightblack slippers,
glossy silken trews, glossy plum longshanks and matching frockcoat, glossy
fullbottom wig of fashionable silver, and – worst of all – betwixt glossy locks
and glossy white neckerchief, a glossy unblemished smile. What woman would not be swept up by such dazzling
cockery?
A pearl would be shamed to stand in this
man’s presence, Economous concluded sourly feeling very drab indeed. He
could not even dismiss the fellow as a high-stepping fluff; for primped and
fashionable as the Reive of Lot-in-the-Hole might have been, he had not strayed
into the kinds of sartorial excesses – huge bows, enormous ruffled
neckerchiefs, fur-lined everything – of a vain and ludicrous dandidawdler.
“The Lord Fold
has so very kindly brought me home today, ma ma,” Asthetica declared with
pointed attention to her mother, yet her cheeks flushed with such pretty
pleasure at such a focus of male attention.
For the merest
pulse of a humour Economous was certain he witnessed an expression of utter horror twist the mother’s
face as she comprehended just who it was that stood resplendent in her shabby
vestibule. However grandiose her ambitions for her daughter, it had clearly
never figured in her reckonings that Asthetica would bring her exulted prize
home.
“A kindness indeed,
my gracious Lord,” Madamine Grouse proclaimed with a shrill display of delight,
curtseying low with a cracking of knee joints and back bone. “Such more zan any
others can do for my wenigblüte, I am
sure,” she added with the briefest, sidelong scowl at the two lowly gents left hapless
on the stairs.
“T’was a trifling,
good lady.” The Lord Fold took the lowly landlady by the hand becked a genteel
bow as she were a duchess of state herself.
Eyelashes
fluttering girlishly fast as any bee’s wings, Madamine Grouse palid face
transmuted to a scarlet hue Economous had never thought possible in such a habitually
sour mien. Fer several beats her mouth made breathless “oh’s” of delight, until
she finally declared, “Such handsome treatment, sir! Such handsome treatment!”
Released once more, the madamine took Asthetica by the hand and drew her daughter
towards the door of their ground floor apartment. “If you please, my lord,
allow me und my delight some moments to refresh
ourselves,” she said with a harsh and nervous laugh, bobbing and nodding
obsequiously even as she retreated.
“Refit and
refurbish, a-hey – as the vinegaroons on the docks would say,” Bidbrindle
offered with a friendly chuckle.
Backing through
her domestic portal, Madamine Grouse glared at him from the shrinking gap, her
eyes communicating perfectly just how inappropriate such terms were to be
applied to ladies, and in the presence of gentry too!
Awkward,
throat-clearing, foot-shuffling minutes commenced and ground on. Leaving the two lesser men
unreleased, Lord Fold seemed quite content to stand in silence, leaning on his
silver-topped baton and staring at a yellowing patch in the green paint above
the Grouse’ family door. He paid no mind at all to the other two men, yet
neither Economous nor clearly the violin-maker had felt themselves unable to go
on with their own small, pointless lives.
With a stout
ruttle, Bidbrindle bravely undertook his marvellous tale of the black-elder
viol on the Reive who looked at the violin maker in a show listening but
clearly barely comprehended him nor saw the need to.
At the place in
Bidbrindle’s telling where the rosewood was being ordered from Turkmantine, the
Reive suddenly spoke. “You there!” he demanded of the violin-maker, stopping
the poor fellow dumb. “Go out to my fit and let my bridleman know I shall be
some time yet.”
“How will I
know which fit is your, m’lord?” poor Bidbrindle asked, even as he moved to
comply.
To this Lord
Fold arched a brow and gave an impatient nod. “It is immediately outside. I can
assure you, you will tell it from all others…”
Whether by
strength of wind or a trained and broken soul, Binbrindle becked and humbly obeyed,
stepping outside.
As the heavy
front swung open then shut again, Economous caught a glimpse of two heavy set
fellows without, waiting on either side of the door : the Reive’s spurns – his
personal guards – little doubt, glowering at all passers and patently ill-at-ease.
Abruptly the
Reive fixed his attention on Economous. “I do believe I know you, man,” he
declared bluntly.
“M – me,
m’lord?” Economous blinked.
“Aye indeed,
man,” Lord Fold returned. “I have been puzzling on it o’er and o’er these many
minutes gone, ‘Where is it that I have
beheld such a distinctively lank-locked and
underfed face before?’ I
never forget a face, you see. Once seen, it is in,” he tapped his smooth brow
with a velvet-gloved finger. “And now I have it!”
Lank-locked, Economous did not hide his
frown. Underfed! “And where have you
seen me, m’lord?” he asked if only to divert his offended sensibilities.
“At the great
gala that strutting foreign duchess-heir held at the fore o’ month: you were a
scribbler there scribbling all the illustrious faces. My how you must have been
agog to be surrounded by such glories, such heights of society – it’s a wonder
you could draw at all. Still, my wife was well pleased with your work.
Wife? Economous’ scandalised mind
lurched. Had the man meant to tell this? He was clearly careless of his
company, but surely the Reive was not this
contemptuous?
Lord Fold went
on without a pause, as if nothing so extraordinary had passed his indulged and
pouting lips. “‘Tis pity that that appalling Branden Rose dame was your first
employer, m’boy, else I might have had you along as a curiosity at my own
upcoming Lestwich Tide. Were she still here I would absolutely have to have
you, but she is – as the papers say – run off again on some outrageous errand,
no doubt to marry some monster if the buzz about certain circles is to be believed… It is a wonder the Emperor did
not demand an explaining when he was with us a fortnight ago. She, of course, was not in the city –
but if I were he I would have summoned her right back from where’er she is
supposed to have slunk off.”
In his growing
dismay Economous barely remarked any of this.
Asthetica cannot surely know that
he is wed already, can she? “You said have a wife, m’lord?” he said, daring
to draw out the appalling revelation so carelessly disclosed.
Yet in the very
moment of utterance he was saved what
would have most likely been a dangerously withering remark and the more
dangerous ire of a well placed peer by the racket of the simultaneous return of
Bidbrindle back from street and Madamine and Miss Grouse emerged again from
their boudoir.
Dressed in fold
upon fold of glistening cloth-of-silver draped over petticoats of blood red
then pristine white, Asthetica stopped all noise dead with her expensive splendour.
Gazing at her
with cool yet patent hunger, the Reive crooked his arm for Asthetica to lay her
hand upon, which she now did with a mannered kind of grace. He then said
something he obviously found funny for he laughed loud and look-at-me drawing a
shrill bray of uncomprehending mirth from the two women as he swept his
beautiful companion out and away.
Dumbstruck, Economous
watched them leave, utterly flummoxed as to how it was he could save Asthetica
from heartbreak and shame without shaming her or breaking her heart instead.
Stamping her
foot to get attention, Madamine Grouse gave a scornful sniff.
The young man
and the older look at her as one.
“I have
reckoned ze new rent arrears to ze start of spring,” she said with sharp tones
so very appropriate to such sharp practice. “You owe me ze difference!” she
proclaimed sourly without looking either man in the eye and slammed the door.
Turning and
climbing the stairs to his own apartment, Bidbrindle tipped a knowing nod to
Economous, as if he and the young concometrist belonged together in the same
hopeless chase. “Raised rents equals fine dresses, methinks,” he said with a
smirk, and retired.
Clearly too
age-ed and frowsty and full of dull stories, that Bidbrindle fathomed his own
cause with Asthetica to be a thin ruse was admirable self-knowledge; that he
thought Economous was his fellow member in such a forlorn school was a bitter
brew. Feeling thwarted and furious with himself, Economous climbed the
shuddering, groaning flights to his cramped garret and lay a-bed on his tandem
chair among the frames and boards and the greasy smell of seed oil, the gusting
turmoil without a perfect twin of that within.
Was he to let
all of his life be stymied by fear?
Was everything
he reached for to be somehow snatched away as impossible?
Yet as wind
battered angrily against the narrow shutters, it seemed to him that facing the
Mouldwood was a less frightening prospect than exposing the blackguard Fold and
laying himself soul-bared to Asthetica.
I will act then, he determined and with
that, fell asleep.
11 comments:
That was awesome Mr Cornish! I like the line "What woman would not be swept up by such dazzling cockery?" Wonderful wordsmithing as always! I can't wait for the novel! :)
I continue to enjoy the story and shall be back for the next installment. As other folks have mentioned, with this second chapter there’s a sense of some momentum building. It was fun meeting the violin maker, and hearing his chatter about instruments and rare woods. I wouldn’t mind meeting him again.
Lord Fold, on the other hand, is so over the top nasty and arrogant (at least to this American, who’s never had to deal with any lords in person) that he comes across more as a caricature than as a person. If his only role is a few minutes on stage now and then to showcase how the nobility abuse the lower classes, I suppose it doesn’t matter. But if he’s actually a player, then I feel like he ought, even if unpleasant as a whole, to have some redeeming qualities. But you know what you need for your story. As noted before, I’m unclear about what sort of feedback or cross-fertilization you’re looking for. Is critique of character development in line?
Speaking purely as a reader now (i.e. not suggesting plot, but just, as I get to know him, expressing my hopes for Economous) I’m hoping that, after warning Asthetica about Lord Fold, Economous washes his hands of her ASAP, moves to lodgings next to the Mouldwood (which we already know, from Factotum, is some of the least expensive in the city), and becomes one of the trusted humans who secretly serve the Lapinduce. Not that I expect any of that to happen so easily, if at all.
I liked the feeling of hopelessly unrequited love building here. Feels very real.
It strikes me that Economous is a rather lonely fellow. When do we get to meet some of his mates? A city boy has got to have someone who helps him get into trouble every now and then.
-Drew
"Yes!," she said, in agreement with Drew. And so looking forward to Branden Rose's scene...
"Dumbstruck, Economous watched them leave, utterly flummoxed as to how it was he could save Asthetica from heartbreak and shame without shaming her or breaking her heart instead."
Beautifully delicate and emotive turn of phrase. (Though I wonder if 'instead' is the right word. Perhaps 'himself' or nothing?)
Great work DM. Excellent flow and interactions. Immersive this week.
I have just discovered that you have been posting these snippets and after spending the time since the release of factotum pining for more tales of the half continent, I am delighted to discover this.
Fabulists have always seemed to me one of the more interesting aspects of society in the half continent and I am hugely pleased to find them being discussed further. Until next week mister Cornish, I wait patiently.
Alyosha has a point about the lord being a bit simple at first pass. Knowing how you play ambiguity with some monsters and Europe, I don't doubt you can create a realistic, rather than exaggerated villain.
My best till next week. More wrenches thrown in the works is a good thing.
-Ben
Aha! So there are gastrine mills after all! We'd been puzzling over that at the forum a few months back and couldn't remembr if gastrines were only in ships.
My favorite part of this was when Madamine excuses herself and her daugher to 'refresh' and then Asthetica re-appears in a completely different resplendent outfit. And having Madamine announce the rent increase immediately after was a great touch!
I'm not entirely convinced that Asthetica would be completely naive about the Lord's marital status. Since Economous recognized him immediately, he must be well-known in Brandenbrass. He remarks that his wife was pleased with Economous' work at the ball, so presumably she was in attendance. Since gossipy publications are popular, surely there's been some mention of the Lord's doings? I wonder if Madamine Grouse might read these since she has such high aspirations for seeing Asthetica well married? Asthetica's job involves a lot of paperwork, which means she's probably working with other dollymops. Girls gossip. Especially about their superiors. {I'm *assuming* here that since Lord Fold brought Asthetica home from work, he's somehow involved in the business.} Then I found myself wondering if maybe Asthetica does know that he's married. Even if she can't consciously admit to herself that something doesn't feel quite right about him, women have gut feelings about these sorts of things. If she did suspect he's married, it wouldn't be consistent with Economous' view of her as perfect, but we know she can't be as flawless in reality as he imagines her to be. Or maybe something entirely unexpected is going on behind the scenes that the reader doesn't know about yet, like Lady Fold is mortally ill and has urged her husband to make the platonic acquiantance of a young lady who he might marry upon his wife's death to care for their five small children. That's far-fetched, but the point is we don't know his motives yet.
As for the Lord seeming utterly bad and one-dimensional so far, I think that's just how Economous would see him. In struts this pompous jerk who can offer his darling everything that Economous himself lacks -- money, prestige, fine clothes, perfect teeth, a carriage ride home from work. Economous isn't going to care if the Lord donates money to a foundlingery or treats his secretary kindly. As far as he's concerned, the man is direct competition for the woman he loves, and unfaithful to his own wife. If the Lord has any redeeming qualities, they might appear later in other interactions, but Economous won't see them so early on.
Ah Wink, you speak wisdom. Certainly given Economous' somewhat biased viewpoint, his perceptions might lead him astray. I'm reminded of how terribly naive Rossamund was inthe first part of Foundling, and how his perceptions of people (such as Europe or Freckle) evolved through the tale. Perhaps some of us were being a bit premature, but that's the consequence with serials versus self-contained novels. Usually a reader will finish the novel and grasp the author's whole will before fielding a response or critique. I know I must withhold any macro level critiques of this particular yarn until it's all laid out before me.
-Ben
100% Agreed. Master Cornish may already have many images, plot branches, and character backgrounds in mind that more than address my comments. On the other hand, the conversation is going to be stilted if we readers are afraid to make anything but 100% positive comments because of our limited viewpoint.
So pleased to find that you have published more writing set in the Half-Continent, Mr. Cornish.
About concerns of an initial "information dump": Chapter 2 part 2, seems a fine place to introduce Lord Sprandis Fold. Earlier mention of his name may not be necessary. Does it not suffice earlier on merely to say that Asthetica Grouse has many suitor's?
I am on the fence as to whether Lord Sprandis Fold ought to be endowed with some redeeming qualitites. Maybe a few noble traits would clarify his motives, and a rival who is less easy to hate would intensify the dilemma Economous faces in pursuing Asthetica; but my instinct as a reader is to sympathize with Economous who, I perceive, feels wary and resentful of Lord Fold who finds it so easy to romance the woman Economous worships from afar. I agree with WinkTabby that Asthetica would not likely be ignorant of Lord Ford's marital status, but Economous in his admiration for Asthetica (and desire to protect her) would likely assume that she doesn't know.
More interesting to me are Economous's belief in benevolent monsters, and how such a belief is barely conceivable to him, but still enough of a possibility to him that he takes conscious care to conceal that belief to avoid risk of persecution.
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